Growing up slowly
When I was growing up in the early 50’s, children were not very well informed, in fact quite the reverse. The realities and cruelties of life were carefully hidden from us. We grew up in a world where all things magical were accepted as fact. Where life was just one happy playground, and where any upset could be melted away with a kiss or word from mum.
There was no television broadcasting images of violence, and the radio aired all good wholesome programmes. We, as children, never heard bad language, never witnessed heavy drinking, and our parents were careful not to discuss anything of a remotely serious nature in front of us. We were totally protected from the ‘real’ world.
I can’t remember how old I was when I discovered that Father Christmas wasn’t responsible for the magic of Christmas, but it wasn’t a massive let down. The magic was still there. All that changed was the realization that my parents had been responsible for the magic all along, and that made it all the more precious to me.
Did we have a traumatic awakening, once we reached an age where we could no longer be protected from the world? No, we didn’t. Were we so ignorant that we ran into all sorts of problems? No we were not. It was a natural progression. Learning about the wickedness, tragedy and deceit that existed in the world, was all part of growing up it’s true, but nobody felt the need to force that upon us at a tender young age. Children were allowed to grow up in their own time.
Am I thankful? Yes I am!
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weechuff | 15 August 2008 at 17:02
I quite agree with you. I believe even primary school children have lessons about sex nowdays. They are all very aware of sexual orientation, rape and violence now. It is so sad that childhood has to be burdened with these adult concerns.
Tim | 15 August 2008 at 18:33
In some areas, children used to see more reality than they do now. I grew up on a farm, and less children see what goes on there every year. They might see images of violence etc, but they never saw their food being butchered or helped pluck chickens. Watching a bloodbath of a movie may not be mentally helpful, but it is not reality. I find city folk to very naive about violence perpetrated in the name of food. Playing video games and watching movies like Spiderman means kids grow up believing everything is ‘magical’ in a different sense. For instance, laws of physics are constantly ignored. They don’t learn from interaction with the real world as much.
Not everyone had a rosy childhood back in the day. It depends on where you grew up, who your relatives were and whether or not your parents were on the ball. I am constantly shocked talking to people older than me who disclose murders that took place, child abuse, alcoholizm and more in all their families when they were small. Maybe we are all extra messed up in Alberta!
Babs (Beetle) | 15 August 2008 at 18:43
Weechuff:
I agree. Children aren’t allowed to be children any more.
Tim:
I’ve no doubt that there are many children who experienced horrors. I know people who did. In general though, children were allowed to have a childhood free from the knowledge of the bad things in the world. BTW, I grew up in London.
Jay | 15 August 2008 at 20:09
Sounds like you had a great childhood, Babs!
I agree, kids these days aren’t allowed to experience the magical parts of childhood before they’re rushed into young adulthood. I told my boys about the bad stuff as and when they needed to know, and I remember the same from my own childhood. We were allowed to believe in the Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus until we were ready to ask questions – or had brothers that replaced those tales with variants of their own! LOL!
Babs (Beetle) | 15 August 2008 at 20:24
Jay:
There were seven of us and we were all told by mum, to keep the magic alive for the younger ones, right down to the youngest. We all did :O)
I wonder who, in their wisdom, or lack thereof, decided that little children should have the innocence of childhood removed so early.
granny grimble | 15 August 2008 at 21:12
I remember wearing my Mummy’s shoes and her dress that swirled around my ankles. But it was a game and I giggled and fell over because I was only about five. Now I see girls seriously trying to win beauty contests. They have full make-up, hair extentions, false nails and spray on tan. It’s not a game, it’s deadly serious and very very sad. They will have a lifetime of being grown up, but no time at all to be little innocent children playing ‘let’s pretend’
Babs (Beetle) | 15 August 2008 at 22:42
granny grimble:
That is so true. I wonder why little kids love slopping around in adults shoes. I was always doing it ;O)
JD at I Do Things | 15 August 2008 at 23:45
This is such a great post. A youngster today reading it might think, Oh, boy, were they in for a rude awakening. But like you said: you progressively grew up, figured stuff out, dealt with it. I remember finding out about Santa Claus. It wasn’t a huge trauma, it was just part of growing up.
Babs (Beetle) | 16 August 2008 at 0:07
JD:
Yes I know my ‘great’ nieces laugh at it. I secretly feel sorry for them. They’ve had half the childhood years we had. They are no more wise than we were at their age. They just witnessed it all earlier.
Chat Blanc | 16 August 2008 at 3:13
What a difference from the experience of many kids today. I see so many kids around where I live that run loose in the streets, wreck havoc, get arrested, and more. It’s sad really.
Mystery Man | 16 August 2008 at 7:00
If only we could go back to those innocent times. When was the innocence lost? I grew up i nthe 80s and early 90s, and even then was nowhere the crumbling soceity and corruption of kids that is going on now.
Lux | 16 August 2008 at 7:48
Luxor’s mom here: I shudder to think that in the future our children will think of these as the good old days.
Drowsey Monkey | 16 August 2008 at 9:24
Excellent post Babs!
I grew up in the 60s/70s and was well protected too. My sister protected her kids as well & they grew up in the 80s. I don't buy that kids can't be protected now a days. I know it's harder, but not impossible and it's just different. I mean, compared to how my mom grew up she was appalled at the fact that I one day told her & dad that they looked 'sexy' when they were all dressed up heading out for dinner. The fact was, I didn't understand the context of that word, just because I heard it on TV didn't change the fact that I was a child. lol … I still remember their reaction tho! Made me go look the word up in the dictionary! HA!
Babs (Beetle) | 16 August 2008 at 14:19
Chat Blanc:
Yes, it is sad. I feel for the children of today.
Mystery Man:
I’m not sure but I think it was the 90’s when things started to decline. Then it went down at an alarming rate!
Lux:
I often say that. I do console myself with the fact that these children have nothing better to compare it with, so accept it as the norm.
Drowsey:
I so agree with you. To a degree we can protect children if we really want to. Unfortunately we can’t prevent them from having to learn what the schools deem to be important teachings at a very young age.
They don’t seem to have grasped that if you teach tiny children about sex, their progression will happen much sooner, leading to the many, teenage single mums we have now.
Black Cat | 16 August 2008 at 14:50
Great post Babs. I grew up in the 50s and 60s too. I don’t think I ever heard a swear word or profanity until I went away to school and I wasn’t told stuff I didn’t need to know about until I needed to know about it (or asked). I think what is happening to and by the young these days is very disturbing.
Thanks for your kind comment on my blog and I’m delighted Livvie wants to do the meme:) xxx
Babs (Beetle) | 16 August 2008 at 15:12
Black Cat:
That’s it exactly. Why can’t they wait until children need to know – like when they ask questions?
LadyBanana | 16 August 2008 at 19:59
It is sad that nowadays no one can keep children away from all the nasties of real life.
Like you, when I grew up one of my main sources of entertainment was my imagination and the beliefs of all the fairies etc..
Babs (Beetle) | 16 August 2008 at 22:51
LadyBanana:
Sadly the ‘Powers to be’ think they know what’s best for us when, in fact, they don’t.
Rich Dansereau | 17 August 2008 at 20:11
I think that the world is so fast paced now, with parents pulled in every direction that there is sometimes a lack of parenting. We ship our kids off to day cares, sometimes when they are infants, to be with non-family members for 8 hours or more a day. If we don’t actually ship them off to day care, many times the television, with all its issues, becomes a babysitter. I taught school many years ago and in many instances the parents wanted the teachers to parent; but as teachers our hands were tied as we could not directly teach morals and values. And who’s morals and values would we teach anyway. This was quite the double edged sword as a teacher. My point is that the fast pace of today’s world unfortunately contributes to an earlier loss of childhood wonder and innocence. I was a child in the 70’s and 80’s in a large city in middle America and was fairly we insulated from the big bad world. Unfortunately, Nancy Reagan’s campaign of “Stranger Danger” actually began to instill a fear in me and many of my classmates when we were about 10 years old. I would have rather had a parent actually keeping an eye on us than to develop a fear of anyone who was unknown.
Babs (Beetle) | 17 August 2008 at 22:25
Rich Dansereau:
Yes, you are right in that the fast pace of life now, along with the working mum, has caused children to be exposed to outside influences far more than ever before.
The parents role seems to be slowly shifting to Schools and government organizations. It is now OK for a ’school’ to arrange an abortion for a child without telling the parents! I find it totally shocking, that the roll of a parent appears to have no importance any more.
Karen & Gerard Zemek | 18 August 2008 at 1:48
I think kids are growing up way too fast these days. It’s scary! I had such a nice childhood and didn’t even want to grow up–I knew a good thing when I had it! Anyway, I think kids should take their time and enjoy being a kid–you’re only young once!
Babs (Beetle) | 18 August 2008 at 3:57
Karen & Gerard Zemek:
Sadly, they don't seem to have that choice any more.
Janice | 18 August 2008 at 23:42
Hi Babs Are you saying Santa Isn’t real? I’ve been hanging up my stocking for years,this can’t be true.
Babs (Beetle) | 19 August 2008 at 0:15
Janice:
Oh did I give that impression? I’m sorry. I only stopped the stocking a few years ago myself ha ha!
gold anne
| 6 September 2008 at 16:53
I have to agree with you all its very sad for children now ,forced to grow up too soon
xxx
beetle
| 6 September 2008 at 17:29
Gold Anne: Yes, I think they miss out on a lot.