This was a journey home I would never forget!
I was fifteen years old and working in the West End of London. It was 5pm and time to make tracks home, so I said goodnight to my co workers and made my way to the bus stop. It took me about forty minutes to get home. A thirty minute bus journey and then a ten minute walk.
As I waited for the bus I got a sudden urge.”Oh pooh! I need the loo, but I’ll be home soon” I thought. “No problem, I can hold it”. The bus arrived, I hopped on and settled down for the journey.
My need for the loo got a little more urgent now and I tightened my muscles, as you do, to keep it under control. I still had about 15 minutes to go, before I got off the bus and I began to panic a bit. “Hold on, just a little while longer” I thought. The feeling slowly ebbed away and I relaxed in the seat. “Thank goodness”, I thought, all too soon, as another wave of urgency hit me.
I was young and had never had problems in this department, sometimes going two, maybe three days before relieving myself. This urgency was surprising to me. Still, if I could hold on, just a little while longer, I would be safely home. I was just glad to be seated. Somehow that felt safer than standing.
Finally the bus arrived at my stop. I had to stand up! “Please God, let it be OK” I prayed, as I slowly stood up. OK, I was safe. I made my way down the bus and stepped off, carefully. I didn’t dare jump off, as I usually did. Now I had to tackle the long walk home. Well, when you need the loo, a ten minute walk seems like a very long walk.
With every step I took the situation became more urgent. Every muscle in my lower body tensed up and in my desperate attempt at keeping things in tact, I could only move my legs from the knee down, as though my knees were tied together. I had no thoughts of trying to look like a trendy teenager, as I waddled, stiffly along the road, with a stiff grimace to match.
It would get worse in waves and I found myself muttering things like, “Oh no! Please no!” and then, “Oh thank you, thank you”, followed by, “No! Nooooo! Please God, no!” Each wave became more desperate than the previous one.
I could see my house in the distance. I waddled on, clenching my bum cheeks, thighs tightly closed and gritting my teeth. Relief was in sight now. “I wanted to run the last few yards, but could only waddle along at a snails pace, if I wanted to reach home safely. I finally reached the door and rang the bell. If I could have rung ten bells I would have, but one had to suffice.
“Hurry up! Ohhh, hurry up! Hurry, hurry, hurrrrry!” I muttered through gritted teeth, as I shifted, stiffly, from one foot to the other. I heard footsteps coming toward the door “Hurrrry!” I muttered again as the door opened. Mum was standing holding the handle and she stepped aside to let me through. Finally I was safely home.
“Quick! I need …………….” Too late.
One more lousy minute was all I needed!